WARNING!
http://jonbandringa.spaces.live.com/
Some stories of my travels and experiences, I also have a picture site that goes along with this one at http://jonbandringa.spaces.live.com/
are thorough) and they didn’t seem to be too happy about the whole Thailand deal, but you gotta do what you gotta do.
so he had basically given up on the whole idea. But as we arrived at the terminal, her and her girlfriend Won were sitting there waiting for us, it was a really cool surprise. We relaxed at the airport and had a beer and got to know each other for a bit while we waited for a shuttle to our next destination, Koh Penang. After testing out which beers in Thailand not to drink, we got on the shuttle. This was particularly fun as we got our first taste of Thai public transit, which was a little Toyota with the tailgate open so they could fit two more little seats on the box. Of course, those were the seats we decided to sit in. Then we took a really nice ferry ride, as the sun set, and got a really beautiful view, it was so nice to see the horizon unhindered by buildings and smog. As we got off the boat, we realized it was getting really dark and we still had all our stuff to lug around, so we quickly found a resort and just threw money at the kind old lady who ran the place (which we affectionately referred to as ‘Momma’) and threw our bags in the rooms. So throughout the day, I walked, took a taxi, took a bus, took a plane, took another bus, took another plane, took another taxi, and took a ferry to get from point A to point B.
limped half speed-walked to the hotel for the most refreshing fresh-water foot washings that anyone has ever had in the history of the world… ever. But now that the ‘saline solution’ had effectively disinfected my foot, I was ready to go again. The girls went to bed, and we found a cool bar close to our place called the ‘warm-up bar’ owned by this guy named Leo. Leo was a real charismatic, happy-go-lucky, and pretty dirty Thai guy who we hung out with for a good chunk of that night. From there we walked around and found ourselves at the beach where they host the full-moon party where there was a lot of cool fire dancing to watch and we sipped on a little more beer and eventually wandered to the hotel and went to bed.

hile. So we all tried swimming again and I was a little freaked out, but I guess the 12 pills a day finally started working (or my nerves had all been fried off from the night before), because my foot barely hurt at all. The water was really shallow but also really clear and there was a cool rock a little ways out, perfect for trying to reach Zen.
uch better. Once we all had a little bass and beer in us, we walked down the beach to a cool black light bar and sat on a big blanket drinking Heineken and chatting until the wee hours about who knows what. As we walked home, me and Mike, like the idiot gringos we are, argued about who got to sleep in the hammock on the porch. Being the gentleman that I am, I graciously conceded and forced myself onto the comfy bed in the air conditioned room and we all conked out.
So we woke up the early next morning to Mike hobbling into our room, and it was then that I realized why Sofia, Won, and Ben were so willing to give up the hammock. His back looked like someone had closed a waffle iron on it, and the way he was walking around, it probably didn’t feel too much different. On top of that, in the middle of the night the hammock broke and he smacked his ass on our porch. Kinda funny in retrospect, especially because it didn’t happen to me. Once we had managed to get out of the room, Sofia spotted a huge snake on the beach, so naturally we chased it. We eventually cornered it into a little stand for keeping snorkeling equipment, and chucked little rocks at it to coax it back out. This weird behaviour attracted a local Thai lady who was walking down the beach and she came over and asked “Excuse me, what you doing?” We pointed to it and she went nuts, shaking her hands in front of her face and making all kind of ‘exclamations’ in Thai. We eventually made an agreement that if we killed it, she would eat it. Fun times.
We hung out for a bit, and then decided to be touristy again, and go ride some elephants. It was kind of fun, the novelty of it wore off pretty quick, but the animals are impressive to be around. It’s cool how something can be so big and so strong and so docile. True, they were quite tame elephants, but
they definitely seem to be pretty relaxed animals naturally (at least from what I’ve seen on discovery channel). In an attempt to make conversation with our ‘driver’ I asked him what sex our elephant was. His response was to point between my legs and say “Same Same.” Body language is awesome.
ancouver. The masseuses (not sure if that’s the correct plural spelling) picked up their mattresses and tried to cover Sofia and I in a little makeshift tent, getting absolutely soaked in the process, but we quickly decided to cut the massage short. Mike and Ben who were in another hut just down the beach had the same idea and we all sprinted back to the bungalow, which was fun enough being half-massaged, the left side of my body was so much more relaxed than the other. Naturally, the first thing me and Mike did then was go for a swim, having given up being dry anyhow.
e. The bar was a little three-tiered tree fort, and there were two guys working there and happened to live there as well. They definitely fit the ‘Rasta’ vibe as Mike and Ben saw one of the guys doing a little rave dance with a candle on his own in his ‘room.’ I saw a guitar sitting on the first of the tiers and after we had a beer or two I went down and picked it up. This attracted the dreadlocked raver out of his room and we had a sort of half jam session, despite the fact that his coordination was a little off and both guitars were horribly out of tune, we still pulled off a little ‘all along the watchtower’… kind of. When I returned to the second storey, I found that the other guy was playing the didgeree-doo with Ben so I found a nice cushion to lay on and listened to that for a little while longer. By this point, Mike had started to feel the repercussions of the five-plates of food that he had for dinner, so he went straight back to the bungalow, Ben and I weren’t done so we went back to the blacklight bar for a nice half drunk philosophical/religious conversation, always a good time.

e time we scooted on back to our resort, it was time to check out from the resort, as the girls had a flight later that day.
it. During this whole experien
ce, three Thai girls had seen us and sat down to watch us and shout their encouragement. It made for a really wicked experience, I didn’t know rock climbing was such a spectator sport, but it certainly made it more fun for me.
hopping.
the sound of dire straits ‘sultans of swing’ came to our ears. Turns out it was a really good cover band, but they played it really well, so we had a seat at the bar and listened to a couple classics. It was like turning to 101.1 back in Van-City for a little while. So we kicked back, had a beer and moved on.
of them had girls running out to grab us. Go figure that three young guys walking around without a girl would be their target customers. Anyhow, it was actually a pretty good time, we played connect 4 and jenga with our respective ‘hosts’ at the bar while we sipped on some more drinks. In the middle of this particular group of bars was a Muay Thai boxing ring, so me and Mike hopped in and did a little sparring. At the end of it all, some guy tossed a big python onto our backs (presumably for a photo op and to make us pay for it) while we were playing, and Ben’s reaction was just to turn to Mike and I and say “There’s a snake on us.” We both kind of nodded and continued with our jenga game. We had hardly kicked back here but we had had our beer so we moved on.
cool crazy energetic little Thai guy, headed up by two long-haired crazy punk chicks, one with a tambourine and the other playing lead guitar. They really put their long hair to use and were waving it around all crazy rocker-style and jumping off chairs and generally going nuts. They played a little bit of everything, from smells like teen spirit to stairway to heaven, and of course, another version (though this time a little rockier) of hotel California. We had had our fill of that song, so we had a beer and moved on… to bed.

ime. Arthur and I argued about the effects of second hand smoke and basically shot the shit for a little while over a couple of beers, after which we walked down the street where we were approached to take pictures with such animals as monkeys, iguanas, and even an eagle (later on in the night I saw a guy with all three on him, must have made for quite the picture). We opted for the monkey like the stupid tourists we were, and then wandered around for a little while until we eventually walked by a bar with loud music coming from it and some ‘interesting’ dancers outside. It turns out it was the nightly transvestite musical show. We both kind of looked at each other like, “I’ll watch if you will,” and found a little niche at the corner of the bar and waited for the show to start. We watched some lip-synched renditions of Celine Dion, Gloria Gaynor, Whitney Houston, and even Elvis (a man dressed as a lady dressed as a man, go figure). It was the type of thing that you were disgusted by, but you really couldn’t look away. I don’t know how any man could make his body look like that, and it’s pr
obably better if I stay ignorant about it, but at face value it was just friggin’ hilarious.
ad we got off for the first island we were
going to check out, that we saw a big family of monkeys running around. We dropped our stuff, ran over to watch them ‘jumping all nimbly-bimbly from tree to tree,’ and took a couple more pictures. The island we were on was the biggest one in the park, so it naturally had the tallest peak, so we took a cool trail up to the top. It was 500m straight up and it only took us about 45 minutes to get to the top, even with waiting for the people in front of us for a good chunk of that time. Pretty wicked steep, which just added to the coolness of the new flora and fauna I was seeing for the first time. Once we reached the peak, we all just sat and took in the fantastic view. It looked like even more than 40 islands scattered on the perfectly blue water, with no tourist resorts or lights or telephone poles to spoil the view. I could have stayed there all day, it was so beautiful, but there was only one thing that was going to tear me away from this: more monkeys. I ripped back down the trail and found the whole family of monkeys hanging out in some low trees right at the trail head. I just kind of stood there for a little while until they got comfortable and came down to start checking me out. There was one little guy that became captivated with either my face or my hair or something head-related, because after we had gone through the greeting formalities of smelling and trying to chew my hands, he started to get real curious. He got down to the lowest of the branches a bunch of times and let me pet him and that, but then he started jumping at me. Now I’m no expert on monkey behaviour so I could be wrong, but I’m pretty sure he just wanted to land on me, it wasn’t an attack. The problem was his target was my head, and like most people do when a monkey jumps at their head, I ducked. Unperturbed, the little guy just climbed up
the nearest tree and we went through the whole hand-grabbing, monkey-petting, head-jumping scenario again. Maybe he saw a flea in there, I don’t know, it made for a pretty cool experience though.
the island, where the water had eroded it, into little caves and such. They were never too far away from the water, but there was a bunch of little cave openings that I’m sure at least on one of the islands you could do a little kayak-spelunking.
watch his fellow bartend
ers throw down their best broken English one-liners on the girls as they came by the bar to order drinks, what a fun place.
hing on the sides of the road but fruit stands and palm trees. I headed south with no real intention of where I wanted to go, basically just adopting the turn left at every major fork in the road attitude. It was a wicked ride, I only made one major pit stop throughout the whole trip, which was to go to a very touristy aquarium / tiger zoo. It was kind of cool, there were tons of tanks that were open and had a small sign on them that said don’t put your finger in it, but it didn’t seem to be strictly enforced, and besides I was literally the only one in the whole aquarium. I played with some sea turtles for a little while and a bunch of other different kinds of fish and walked out about 20 minutes after
I had walked out. Then there was a ‘take your picture with a tiger’ booth set up that I opted for, where the employees were definitely in need of a vacation of their own. After I had paid it was come-in-sit-down-put-your-arm-there-SNAP-get-out. Still cool though, I mean it was still a tiger.
t there names are Kim and Leah, and they are friends of all of my high school friends. None of us had never really talked before, just seen each other at get-togethers and bbqs, but we seemed to get along just fine and we hung out for the rest of my time in Thailand. After dinner, we went out to a cool place called the reggae bar with more live cover music. They probably played hotel California again, but I had effectively tuned them out, as me Kim and Leah chatted about what the old high school clan is up to and basically just had a cool time. After that we went for a nice little midnight / early morning swim and headed to our respective bungalows.

Kim was in the mood for real drip coffee which was hard to come by, so I figured ok I can manage that. But then she bought some sort of mango iced smoothee of some sort, which I think kind of defeated the purpose. Oh well, I guess if you’re gonna be a tourist, you might as well go all out.